


Father's Lament

by fishhuh



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Character Death, Gen, Ghosts, Grief/Mourning, Heavy Angst, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Loneliness, Parent Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Past Character Death, Phil Watson-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Winged Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), ghostbur is very kind, ghostbur needs a hug asap, i dont even know if its canon at this point but idc, not mentioned i just think its cool, philza is tommys dad aswell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-16 14:15:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29083755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fishhuh/pseuds/fishhuh
Summary: The recollections of a mourning father.
Relationships: Ranboo & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo & Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo & Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), dont ship ccs ya weirdo
Comments: 4
Kudos: 100





	Father's Lament

**Author's Note:**

> yo i just wanna say all characters in this fic are the dream smp characters, not their creators! also shipping real people unless they've explicitly consented to it is pretty weirdchamp :/  
> also I hate that the character tags use their real names like damn bro can we not separate characters from their creators when tagging?? smh
> 
> anyways my first ever proper fanfic was really just philza going "lol my kids are dead" huh?
> 
> (title from the song fathers lament by poor man's poison bc I'm so unoriginal I literally just use the song title)  
> Comments are greatly appreciated ❤️

The cabin always seems colder when nobody is home. And it was especially cold today. 

The windows were all shut, a wilted flower sat on the windowsill outside, slowly drowned in snow. Phil watched its petals fall away. It had been a gift from him to Techno. But he had let it die, just like every other thing he had ever tried to love. 

Techno hadn't been home in a while. Not really. Sometimes Phil would hear the front door open, and the shuffling of feet climbing down a ladder. A chest opening, and then shut. And then the house was quiet again. No greetings or waves, no jokes, and no laughter. Techno was always silent. As if Phil was never there. 

He remembered Wil used to get like that when he was small. When he got quiet and hid in wherever he felt was most safe at the time. Phil would look for him, worried out of his mind. But he always found him. And when Phil peeked inside his hiding spot to ask how he was doing, Wil looked at him with big eyes and hugged him. But now those eyes, once full of laughter and adoration, were glassy and empty. Every time Phil tried to remember the little boy he had proudly loved as a son, he was plagued with the cold, lifeless eyes of a broken man. Every time he drove his sword into the heart of a monster, saw the hot, sticky blood stuck to a brown jacket. He saw the sword in his hands, and a pair of hands over his own. 

He would never forget the look on Wilburs face as he drove that blade into his chest. There was no fear. No pain, nor anger. Simply a gentle, apologetic smile and a tear stricken face. And then the blinding light of an explosion. 

And then there was Tommy. Phil didn't think he would ever forget how lost Tommy looked when he saw him fighting alongside Techno. He had gone through hell and back, and then there he was, looking up at his own father, destroying the remnants of his home. Hurting the one person who mattered most to him. Phil had just taken his hope and torn it to shreds. He had drawn a winning hand in a game of cards he never wanted to win. 

The wind outside grew louder as the front door rattled open. Phil startled from his thoughts and looked over. Techno stood in the doorway. Blood slowly dried on his robe. He refused to meet Phil's eyes. He simply made his way downstairs. 

"Techno, wait-" Phil cringed at how quietly his voice came out. 

Techno went still. 

"I didn't mean to" He whispered, tightening his grip on his axe in a feeble attempt to hide his shaking hands. 

Phil slowly got up, careful not to make too much noise. The last thing he needed was Techno getting more upset than he already was. "Was it-" 

"No," Techno said quietly. "No people. Just a pig" despite his wording, his voice still dripped with guilt. 

Phil walked over and gently placed a hand on his shoulder. Techno tensed at the sudden contact but quickly relaxed his arms. "I don't blame you, mate." He said. Techno let out a small laugh at that. 

"Sure you don't, it's not like I was the one who killed them in the end." The sarcasm hurt Techno himself more than it hurt Phil. Phil sighed, and slowly took the axe from his hand. Techno let him. He was too tired to fight anymore. 

"Come on. I'll make us some food." 

  
  
  
  


After that, Techno came home more often. He even occasionally made a joke or two once in a while. But despite that, there was something still missing. 

Someone was still missing. 

The small base outside still sat alone. When Phil looked closer, he saw two cats sitting just outside. Like they were waiting for someone to come home, but they never did. And yet they still waited, guarding an empty home they hoped would be filled once again soon. 

That was the first sign that Phil knew something was wrong. He went outside to go investigate further. 

The cats weren't just guarding the base, it seemed, but an object. Once in a while one of the cats would go over to it and sniff it, watching to see if it would move. Phil recognized that cat. Enderpearl, he was pretty sure. He walked up to the cats, shushing them as they grew agitated. 

"I'm not gonna hurt you, or take anything. I'm just looking after someone." He coaxed the cats away from the object to get a closer look. It was a small, leather-bound book. Etched onto the cover in messy handwriting read the words;

_ Do not Read _

Ranboo's memory book. Why was it here, just laying on the ground? Ranboo never would leave something so important, no, vital to him, just laying out on the snow. There were smudged, sweaty thumbprints on the edge of the cover. Someone had recently written in it. Phil knew he shouldn't open it, it was Ranboo's memories. Reading them without permission would be a whole other level of privacy invasion. But Ranboo wouldn't just leave it out here. Something must have happened to him. 

Letting out a shaky breath, Phil reached down to open the book. The first thing he noticed as he flipped through the pages was a sentence containing his name. He stopped. 

_ Phil is your friend _

Phil looked at the words. He didn't know how long he had been looking at them before the ink began to smudge as the page slowly got wet. Was he crying? He quickly rubbed his eyes, not wanting to ruin the page any more than he already had. He turned to the next page, and his blood went cold. 

_ (: _

Drawn in eerily perfect, smooth lines, was a smile. Phil had remembered that one time Ranboo saw someone draw a smile like that, he had apologized and left the room. Why was something like this in his memory book, of all things? 

Phil stopped. And then suddenly he was on his feet frantically searching.  _ Dream.  _ He remembered Ranboo telling them he had blown up the community house. That he had one of  _ the _ discs. Suddenly it all began to make sense. 

The wind only grew stronger the longer Phil looked for Ranboo. The ice bit his face viciously, but still, he searched. Then he remembered something Ranboo once told him. The rain hurts him if he isn't wearing his armour. If rain hurt him, then that means all other forms of water would too. Phil ran for the small pond just to the right of Ranboos home. 

He didn't know what he was expecting, not really. But when he looked down, it took every fiber in his body to keep him from falling to his knees. 

In the bottom of the pond, sat a small, golden crown glinting off the water's reflection. The remnants of a suit floated around it. It looked like it had been burnt into small pieces. 

Ranboo's skin would sizzle in the rain. 

Phil reached down into the pond. It wasn't very deep, so it was easy to pull up the crown into his hands. He held it there in front of him, simply staring. Remembering the head it should be sitting on. It felt painfully cold in his hands. 

A small gasp startled Phil. He turned around. 

"Ranboo?" Ghostbur murmured, his voice barely louder than a whisper. Phil just stared at him, at a loss for words. 

He eventually settled on simply shaking his head. And Ghostbur's face broke. It hurt, seeing that same broken face he saw above the blade in his hands in the past, now sitting on the face of a man who wore his son's body, and held his son's memories, but wasn't the same son he had watched grow up for all those years. 

Ghostbur walked over and kneeled next to Phil. He reached out, touching the crown that lay in Phil's hands. Neither of them spoke. There was nothing for them to say. Phil had grown fond of Ranboo. He would maybe even think of him as a son to him. He would never forget the way the boy would wave at him and Techno from afar, or how genuinely worried he was that they would kick him out for having one of the discs. No matter how many times Ranboo tried to say otherwise, Phil knew that he had a kind heart. He didn't know what he would do without Ranboo there, always there to break the silence somehow. 

It felt like hours had passed before Phil himself broke the silence.  Watching the ghost of what his son once was sitting in front of him had gotten to him, he'd admit. He couldn't help but blurt out the question. 

"Was it a quick death? When I.." 

Ghostbur hesitated. "I don't know. I don't remember much from when Alivebur died." He paused. "I do know he...  he wasn't mad at you." 

"What?" 

"He loved you. He didn't want to admit it but, behind all that anger and grief, he missed his father. He knew you cared about him. He really did."

Phil looked at Ghostbur in disbelief. "But… how? All I've done is ruin his life. Hell, I was the one who fuckin' ended it!" he punctuated this with a small, broken laugh. 

Ghostbur gave him a small, sad smile. 

"I know you don't think you are, but, Alivebur thought you were a good father." He paused and looked up at Phil. 

"I think you're a good father too." 

Phil looked down. The crown felt cold in his hands, but somewhere, deep in his heart, he felt the warmth of hope. 

**Author's Note:**

> the entire fucking time I was writing this I just had this image ingrained in my mind:  
> https://www.reddit.com/r/dreamsmp/comments/ksbh6o/canon_vs_fanon_philza/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf
> 
> (just copy and paste the link into google I'm too tired to figure out if I can make it clickable or not)


End file.
